Magnetic Mindset - Self-Belief Tools for Every Stage of Business
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In today's episode, we are diving deep into the topic of self-worth and how it plays a crucial role in scaling a business. I share my personal experiences and insights on nurturing self-worth, reframing beliefs, and overcoming self-doubt along the way.
Listen to this episode to hear:
The changes I made to my mindset when going from six figures to multi-six figures
How to close the gap between where you are and where you want to be
How to harness your desires to conquer your fears
Motivation to empower you to take ownership of your own dreams and desires
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Resources:
Download your How to Scale at Every Stage of Business handbook HERE
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Join my Masterminds for Every Stage of Business HERE
Find me on Instagram @pandorapaloma_
Transcript
Hello, and welcome to this episode of the Magnetic Woman Podcast. I am chiming in with a short and sharp episode today. A five minute upgrade, mindset reset for you.
Something that has come up with one of my clients at every stage, so in each individual mastermind over the last week, has been self worth. And, I myself, raising my hand, have had to do so much work on feeling into my worthiness. And it has occurred, been required should we say, at every single stage. I thought I would just explore with you how I personally have overcome not feeling worthy at each stage, and also some of the things that I invite my clients to do when we are nurturing and building their self worth.
In the early stages, the likelihood is you do not have evidence. Right? You do not have evidence that you have done the things that you desire to do. Also, at this stage it can feel really easy to feel that imposter syndrome.
"Do I know enough? I haven't done this for enough time. Am I worthy of charging these prices?"
And ultimately, with imposter syndrome, my view on it is it's self doubt. We just don't have the evidence that we can do the things, because we haven't done them before. Therefore at that stage we really, really need to back ourselves because we're building evidence along the way. That can be really difficult.
What I always advise at this point is to create your evidence list. Now, some of these things might not be, "I've had a client pay me two thousand pounds", because that might not have been something you've experienced yet. However, what you will have is evidence that you have created change in people's lives. So , if you are training to be a coach, you will have supported people in their own challenges, reframing their subconscious beliefs and help them to feel more confident to take the next step in their life or their business (whatever industry and themes that you explore in your work).
You can start to build what I call your evidence list. "I know that I can do this because...". Whilst you might not of the exact evidence, you will have supportive evidence that you can do the thing. So for example, for me, when I went from intuitive eating and living coaching (which is what I did in the first couple of years of my coaching practice), I wrote a book on that theme, Intuitive Eating and Living Six Week Programme, and I knew at that point that I was going to be taking the direction of business coaching.
I had people in my audience come to me and say, "Do you do business coaching? Because your marketing is so good. You're doing so well in your business. How are you doing it?"
And what came through was like, well, yeah. I'm a natural marketeer. I love storytelling. I'm good with words. I really understand messaging. I know that that's what has made this easy for me. Now, what I didn't have was evidence that I could coach people in business because I hadn't done that before. But I knew that I had, at that point, 15+ years in Marketing and Communications experience. I knew that I had, at that point, built a six figure business on messaging alone. So, I used a lot of my past experiences to support my evidence list, knowing that those were the things that would support me to become who I wanted to become.
First things first, early stages, is really understand what is it that you are telling yourself and know that if you don't have the exact evidence, you get to build your evidence list, knowing that that will be the thing that supports you in feeling confident (and enough, and worthy) to go ahead and take the next step.
When we get to the scaling-to-six-figure mark, you may find that self doubt creeps in because at this stage, you're starting to build maybe a team - you might take on your first hire - or you're really starting to hone in on what you want to be known for. You've done the early stages and now it's like, "okay. I know who I am. I know what I do. I know how I do it", and what comes with that is greater responsibility.
There might be some self doubt around thought leadership, and really saying the things that you want to say about your work and your industry, and that is obviously gonna cause potential self doubt to come through. This is where you really wanna build that evidence list and go deeper. I find that the scaling-to-six-figure mark is where we really get to chime into self leadership. Really choosing to be the living embodiment of our work.
And at this point, that is going to look like being able to set certain boundaries. It's gonna look like, having clear boundaries around how you want to work, what you want to be known for, and the kind of rooms that you want to be in. Who do you want to be? It's not all about what you're doing - it's who you're being.
How are you speaking to yourself? How are you acting, behaving? How are you behaving with your clients? How are you supporting yourself? What does your regulation practice look like?
There's such a beautiful journey that we get to approaching the six figure mark, which really is about self-leadership, knowing that everything starts with you. I find at this stage daily mindset work is required. Daily mindset work, and then really allowing yourself to feed that into the body.
I also would say at this point, it's kind of the easiest time for us to forget the mindset work because we've kind of hit that first goal. Right? We're like, "Well, I'm making my 5K months. So , okay. I'm halfway there to making 10K", well, £8333, which is a six figure mark per month. You might find that you're like, "Well, I know what I'm doing because I'm already starting to make money and things are really working for me", and so you forget to do the things that maybe you were doing in the beginning daily mindset work, because you kind of feel like you've got more figured out.
And then what can happen is over time, of course, repetition is building that habit, the self doubt starts to creep in. So, I would say if you are at that stage in your business where you're scaling to the six figure mark, do not forget your daily mindset work. It's gonna be so important for you at this stage to keep doing the basic stuff - I would consider mindset work, affirmations, mantras, looking at what you're telling yourself.
Is is it true? If it's not true, what's a better story? It's really about understanding, what are the stories that you're telling yourself about your next level? It's so easy for us to forget that part at this stage, but actually, it's really, really important so that the self doubt doesn't start to creep in.
So, scaling to six figures, evidence list, and then really looking at storytelling. What are the stories you're telling yourself? Are they true? If they're not true, what's the better story? Really tuning into the story that you are creating, and then making sure that you are the living embodiment of that truth. The living embodiment of that work.
Then we get to scaling from six figures to multi six and seven. Now, at this stage we are self leading and we're also leading others. What can come up here is self doubt around management of a team, self doubt around how easeful getting to that next level is going to be.
There is gonna be opportunities for you to tune into the responsibilities of being a multi six, seven figure business owner, because, let's just be real here - you've got more skin in the game. There's more responsibility. You're now not just showing up for your clients, but you're showing up for your team. And that's a big deal. So, you know, self doubt might creep in, and typically I see this as like, "this actually feels really, really scary. Can I do this? Can I do this whilst simultaneously being able to support my family and be present with my family? Can I do this without working more hours because, I'm already working the amount that I would like to work?" There's all of these things that come in and - "can I do this? Can I actually hold this much?" So at this point, you really want to be anchoring into, again, evidence, but also here's where you really get to tune into how you desire to be a leader in your business, in your community, in the world.
For me, what really happened when I hit that stage was that - the only way I can describe it is that I grew up. I really grew up.
In order for me to be able to hold more in my business, I had to choose to stop sweating the small stuff.
I had to choose that it was really, really safe for me to be held , and that I was able to ultimately delegate things and elements in the business, but just it wasn't worthwhile me having my fingers in those pies. In allowing myself to let go of those things, I was able to free up the space for me to then be who I wanted to be in the business. And this is something that I've seen happen and it definitely happened for me at this stage. Because the responsibility felt greater, I was trying to hold on to all the things. Like, I just need my finger here, my fingers here, my fingers here - oh my god. I've got all of this to do.
And actually, what was really really supportive for me at that time was to move into my self belief that I am worthy to be held. I am worthy to have people support me and my mission. So, it's turning it around. It's less actually about us at this stage. It's really about really feeling safe and worthy enough to ask for support and be supported.
Then to add to this, this is the opportunity for the bigger story. Right? You've written your story at this point, but if you have that deep desire to really upgrade, what's gonna happen is you're gonna be upgrading all areas of your life. And so, the self worth piece here is, I am worthy in my business. I am worthy in my life. I am worthy in my health. I am worthy in all of my being. I am worthy.
And the reason for that is how we do one thing is how we do everything. Right? So at this stage again - bigger responsibility. It's like, well, if I'm gonna be holding this in my business, what is the support that I need outside of my business so that I have the space and the time and the capacity to be who I wanna be in my business? How I do one thing is how I do everything. So I found that if I were picking at all of the detail in my business and trying to hold everything, where else was I doing that in my life? And that looked like me asking for support outside of the business. And I often say, I sort of have more support outside of the business than I do in the business, so that I can be who I desire to be, and I'm very hands on, I'm in the sales process. But there are things that I just had to decide and stick to like, I'm not doing this anymore. This is not for me. This is not for me to own anymore. And get really, really safe that I am worthy enough to be held.
So, bringing it together. Evidence, of course. Evidence that you can do it even though there's more responsibility, there's more skin in the game. And making sure that you're really tuning into that bigger, bigger story of who you desire to be in the world, how you are leading yourself and how you are leading others, and what do you need to let go of in order to feel supported and worthy in your scaling and experience and growing into that next level.
And then a couple of tools that I share with my clients all the time is asking the question, what is the self doubt protecting me from?
Like, ultimately, it's never an inner critic. It's an inner protector.
It’s that question. What is the inner voice protecting me from? What am I afraid of? Something I play with a lot is, how can I allow my desire to be greater than my fear? Because fear is always going to be there. What if I get it wrong? What if I can't do it? That's gonna be there at every single stage. So it's like, okay. Well, what if I can get it right? And can I allow my desire to get it right and to succeed and to meet that goal to be greater than my fear, because fear is always gonna be there.
I kind of imagine this energetically - here's my fear. Feel it in the chest. Right. There it is. And I give it love, and I give it compassion, and I accept that it's there, and I speak to it. It's like, I'm gonna walk with you, and we don't need to be afraid.
And then I tune into the frequency of my desire, and I feel the potency like a bright white light, a golden light, expanding bigger and bigger and bigger and bigger. That's my desire. Yeah? My desire becomes greater than my fear when my fear is seen, and witnessed, and nurtured and told, "we've got this. We're gonna be okay". Then I often will look at where I'm at versus where I wanna be, and what is in the middle and how do I close that gap? What are the beliefs? What's the stories that I'm telling myself? Are they helpful? If they're not helpful, what's a more helpful story? And then I write a series of mantras or affirmations that are really in line with that specific piece. Like, I am worthy to meet that next level of income. I am worthy to... [insert here]. And so you really, really speak to, it's safe for me. I'm worthy of this, and here are the reasons is why, so anchoring into that.
And then finally - and this is something I shared with my masterminders today as their CEO activation for the week - I write down all of the reasons that I am worthy, just because. So, not the things that I've achieved, not because, you know, I'm this or that, and I've hit this milestone, but because I am a human being that was born worthy.
So, I am worthy because I am kind. I am worthy because I care deeply about humans and potential. I am worthy because I am a morning person and love how it makes me feel to watch the sunrise every day. So, it's not like, “I'm worthy because I wake up at 5AM”, right? That's the doing. It's the, “I'm worthy because I'm an early riser, and I really enjoy connecting with the Earth at this time of of the day”. So, it's the real, “I am worthy because this is who I am, this is who I am being”, versus this is what I'm achieving. This is always so helpful as a gentle reminder of - you were born worthy.
And then the final thing that comes to me and I share with clients all the time - so much of our worth is, “who am I to do this?” And my response is , “who are you not to?”
Who has told you who you get to be? Because, no one gets to tell you who you are, and the thoughts of “who am I to do this” - who are you not to? You are the only person that can dream up your dreams. I can't dream your dreams for you. I can support you with your vision and the how to make it happen, but ultimately it's your dream. Your dream. And if you can imagine those things, if you can see those things for you and that's what you deeply desire, no one else is gonna make that happen apart from you. So no one gets to tell you who you are. And if you're thinking, “who am I to do this?” It's like, who are you not to? Do it for the world. Do it for yourself. Do it for your family.
Something I've played around with so much when it comes to worth and finances and raising wealth - it's safe for me to be the person in my family who increases wealth in this way. I don't have evidence that that's possible for me, because no one in my family earns multi six figures. No one has hit seven figures. No one else really runs a successful business, or business of their own at all. So, I don't have that evidence. So, when I'm tuning into my own codes and beliefs, it's safe for me to be the first person in my family to go to university, which is also true. It's safe for me to be the first person in my family who hits this level of wealth. It's safe for me to surpass this income plateau that I have found myself in. It's safe for me to be that person in the world, for me.
And I think that this also leads me into this second piece. When we are attaching our worth to what we're doing, but for other people, you're always gonna lose yourself in that.
I don't do what I do for anyone other than for me. Of course, there is the mission, there's the impact, but ultimately it's, my fulfillment, my pleasure, my joy.
So final thing - where are you attaching worth based on others' opinions? Where are you attaching worth based on who you've been told to be - what other people maybe see as success? I do this for me because it fulfills me. No one around me cares, really. If I said to my now fiance, “Listen, I actually think I'm just gonna not work for a bit and go back to uni”, he'd be like, “Cool. Okay. Well, whatever. Let's support you in that. How do we make that work?” You get to wanna do the things that you do. You get to wanna have more impact, just for you. More wealth, just for you. More kindness, more generosity, just for you. Not because you think it will make you look better or seem better in the world or people will like you more, because let me tell you, not everyone is gonna like you, even for you being you, you know?
I hope this has been helpful. Mindset at every stage, and building self worth at every stage is something that comes up a lot. It comes up with myself, and with a client this week. Listen up. Let's not make you wrong here. Let's not make you wrong that you're feeling this way. You're human, and this is normal. And it's a very, very normal part of business at every single stage because, you know, there's responsibilities. There's fear. It's normal.
Business by nature is not the most regulating space, right? It's uncertain and it can feel scary at times. I hope this has helped.
If you have any questions, please come and find me over on the gram. You can find me @pandorapaloma _. I'd love to share more with you. I love hearing from my community. And if you have enjoyed this podcast, please do rate and review. It really does help to get more and more people listening to these episodes. Thank you so much, and sending big love from my corner of the world to yours.
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